Buck up, Steph!

Jeff's at cancer camp this week as the camp doc. He and the camp kids and other staff get to float down the Salmon River all week. I wonder what it's like right now for him with the sun just setting and the day cooling off. I wonder if their campfire is burning low and if he's strumming his guitar while the river's flow sings in accompaniment. I wonder if the mosquitoes are buzzing, if the food tastes marvelous (doesn't it always taste better outside?), if the canyon walls have darkened their day early. I wonder if the kids feel the wonder of life and living, the beauty of the world around them, and if their senses (like mine) are heightened in the wild. I imagine the day was spent with laughter as the river carried them downstream, and the night is spent with stories and song as their bodies sink into rest.

I miss my Jeffrey. Funny how my daily living is really not that different with him out of town since he's so seldom home anyway, but just knowing he's out of reach makes me want to find him. I hope he's happy and helping the camp kids make great memories.

Meanwhile, life goes on here. Swimming lessons, soccer practices, soccer games, piano lessons, Cub Scouts, 11-year-old Scouts, birthday party (Sam's turning 12!!!!!????), and a race to get ready for Saturday.

A race? Oh, yes, a race. Oliver is running the 5K, Sam's registered for the 10K (although he may change his mind and do the 5K instead), and I'm signed up for the 10K. Not a big deal - except that somebody (me) is injured (again) and can't run. I haven't run for a week. That might not seem like a big deal to others, but it is to me. My sweet running partner is a Physical Therapist and has been helping me. My rotten leg, however, has not been cooperating. I've been on my bike more in the past two weeks than I have in the past two years as I try to maintain my fitness without ruining my leg. I admit that I now really like cycling. My longest ride (it's nothing compared to my husband's rides) was a 30 miler this week - and if I had had time I would've kept going. I've also had some good swims (including an open-water swim in my new wetsuit, which I don't like - I prefer my old one) and also am getting strength training in, and yesterday went roller-blading around the park so I could keep up with the kids on their bikes.

Still, as much fun as that all is, I do miss running. A lot.

So there you go. I miss Jeff. I miss knowing he's near enough that I could call if I needed. I miss having him come home to help tuck the kids into bed. I miss hearing the garage door open when he turns into the driveway.

And to a lesser degree, I miss running. I miss feeling my legs move me up a hill and my stride change to meet my goals. I miss watching the sun rise over the farmer's fields as I run run run.

Guess who's feeling melancholy?

My brother Don gave the most amazing talk in church today. Don is quadriplegic. He was born with Cerebral Palsy and has never been able to walk, use his arms, or speak clearly. Nobody has ever invited him to speak in church before. But Brother Kelly broke the unspoken rule and asked him to do it. What a wonder it was.

"This is my first sacrament meeting talk ever," he began, "so I hope you'll be patient with me as I talk about patience." The congregation was hooked. You could have heard a pin drop during the next few minutes as Don's spirit spoke to ours, even when his voice was difficult to understand. He sat up front, off to the side, with his computer to read from and my dad holding the microphone for him. Fortunately, his words were projected onto the drop-down screen at the front of the church so we could read along, one line at a time (power point is awesome!) as he talked about learning patience, including how he has to be patient with his body's limitations.

Patience with a body that doesn't work and a mind that knows, and a life destined to be single until the next life...

I suppose I can be patient with my leg that hurts a little. I suppose I can be patient with missing a spouse that I at least have home sometimes. I have every reason to be grateful for what I have.

Oh, my, I have so much to learn.

Running Happy

For the past two years, my boys have raced in occasional 5Ks (that's 3.1 miles). Sam, who is the ripe old age of 11, told me yesterday he wants to race in the St. Anthony Pioneer Days 10K (and that's 6.2 miles) race.

Being the supportive Mom I am, I said no way. Nope. Uh-uh.

Okay, not unless you do some training first. So I suggested he go out on a little run, maybe get two or three miles in to start training. He begged that I let him run around town instead of just around the neighborhood. We looked at a map and set the parameters of where he could run, and I told him he had to be home in an hour (I'm all about letting the kids loose - as long as it's in an enclosed area and time limit :) Hyper-vigilant? Maybe. But I'd rather be too careful than have something bad happen.)

He was so excited to be independent. He used my armband to hold the phone and use the Nike+ app, and I sent a Hammer flask of water with him. He got his playlist going, ear buds in, water in hand, and set off on an adventure. After 45 minutes with him gone, I began to get a little anxious. At 55 minutes I was thinking of grabbing the keys and the other kids to go in search of Sam. But then he appeared, red faced and grinning with the Runner's High. He had just run 6.26 miles in 57 minutes. That's a 9 minute mile on his first run out.

Alright, I guess I can let him run that 10K race now.

We're both still floating on the high of his unexpected successful run yesterday. He's been adamant about signing up for football this fall and I've been trying to talk him out of it (his lean body just isn't built for it!). Now he's seriously considering cross-country instead. Hooray!

And while we're talking about running boys, I need to extol Oliver's (he's 9) running talent, too.

That boy can sprint. Holy cow, he's fast! On a short sprint, I can't keep up with Sam, and Sam can't keep up with Oliver. Right now Sam has speed and stamina, and Oliver has speed and speed. Me, I just have stamina. This is where life's not fair (after all, I'm the one doing all the training) but I could't be happier about it.

I'm tickled that my guys are faster than me and I can see my girls are well on their way to beating their

dear ol' mom, too. Yippee! (Honestly, though, if they don't want to be runners, that's fine. There are plenty of other things to do, too - not sure what, though).

Oliver told me yesterday that he thinks he might be more of a cyclist, like Dad. Bet that's just fine with Pops. :)

Runner Steph, Meet Cyclist Steph (she's a stranger 'round here)

Last Tuesday I met up with some friends to go for an early morning bike ride. I am a runner, not a cyclist, but every once in a while I try to get out on my bike. It kind of helps to have ridden a time or two each summer before my annual triathlon...

(A flat on a previous ride, but same friends I rode with on Tuesday)

I want to learn to like my bike, mostly because I feel obligated since I have it, but also because Jeff rides and I'd like to join him sometime when I feel comfortable on the bike. I keep thinking that I'll never learn to like riding unless I actually get out and do it. So I resolved to join the ladies on Tuesday and prove to myself that riding really wasn't as painful as I remembered.

It really was painful.

Worse than I remembered. I was out of breath before I made it to my neighbor's driveway. I was more out of breath as I tried to carry on a conversation and act as if nothing was wrong. I was miserable by the time we crested the hill. And finally at a whopping 2 miles out, I was done. Done. I couldn't believe I was saying it, but out came the words, "I have to stop. I can't do this." And completely out of character, I peeled off and headed the whole two miles back home like a dog with its tail between its legs.

I never quit. No matter how I'm feeling, if I start something I just don't quit. I spent the entire day Tuesday puzzling over my actions, wondering what brought on this odd behavior, and feeling like a complete and utter failure. I even cried more than once that day because I was so frustrated. I couldn't keep up. Sheesh, I could barely even start! I wondered if I should just give up on the bike. I could sell it and get some new running gear, couldn't I? I sobbed to Jeff, "How in the world can I ever learn to like cycling if I keep having bad experiences!?"

Jeff is very level-headed. He is as steady and logical and reasonable as they come. And kind, too. He just smiled at me and said, "You need to just go out on your own sometimes and have fun - don't worry about keeping up with anyone, just do your own thing."

I realized that a huge part of the problem was the stress and anxiety I get when riding (or sometimes even running) in groups - I worry that I won't keep up, that I'll hold people back, that I'll ruin their ride or run. At my two-mile turn back point on Tuesday I was struggling to keep up and terrified of the potential suffering in the upcoming hour. So I quit.

Jeff reminded me that I was sick and had been sleeping way more than usual as I fought off the cold and sore throat. And I remembered that I'd not eaten much for several days (sickness makes me lose my appetite), so there were definitely valid reasons for quitting, but if I had been running I don't think I'd have quit. Sure, I would have had a miserable run, but I wouldn't have stopped.

I know myself as a runner.

I don't know myself as a cyclist.

Runner Steph, meet Cyclist Steph. She's a stranger and you don't know what she's capable of. That makes me wary and a little unconfident. Okay, a lot unconfident.

(Me & my friend Heather, whose husband helped fit both my old bike (pictured) and my new bike to me.)

Being the compulsive type, I decided to take Jeff's advice and go out again the next day (you know what they say, just get back on the bike when you fall - or fail!). I went on a solo ride and spent some time getting to know Cyclist Steph. It wasn't the ideal morning for a ride with 20+ mph headwinds the first and last 6 miles and crosswinds on other parts of the ride, but I didn't have to worry about my speed, didn't worry I'd be slowing someone down, didn't need to save my breath for talking, and could focus on the ride.

I'm so glad I did it. Tuesday: 2 miles of fatigue and anxiety until I turned around. Wednesday: 20 miles of strength and relaxed riding. I wasn't speedy - the winds certainly had something to do with that. Overall I averaged 15mph, which included the snail-pace 7mph ride on the uphill (I can RUN up hills faster than that! Oh, this is pitiful!), but also included topping out at 38mph on the downhill. THAT was cool.

So cool that this morning (now Monday) I chose to ride my bike instead of running. I rode the same route, this time with very little wind, and finished the 20 miles six minutes faster. It was another solo ride - trying to get my conditioning up to where I can ride with friends again. (I did join a 20+mile ride with some friends a few weeks ago, in rain and wind - they let me draft. I told you I'm not very good at this, but I'm trying!)

So anyway, it's coming. Tomorrow I'm doing my favorites - running and swimming. I have a half-marathon race on Saturday so technically I'm tapering this week and won't be doing too many workouts the rest of the week. But I bet I'll be on my bike again soon.

My husband (I could also call him my therapist, couldn't I?) regularly rides twice, thrice, four times the distance I'm at (and in a LOT less time). He's definitely inspiring me. And encouraging me. I love that he expects me only to have fun and has no pre-conceived notion that my running fitness would translate to cycling prowess. I don't think I'll ever be great, or even good - just mediocre. After all, I'm first and foremost a runner. But I'm a runner that is learning to (almost) love cycling.

Post script: I now know that I won't be racing the half-marathon on Saturday. There will be other races, but there will only be this one time to attend Grandpa Rasmussen's funeral - a great, good man, one of the very best.

Memorial Day Weekend

I'm beginning this post on Saturday, May 29th. Midnight. And not sleepy. I already went to bed, already went to sleep, and already even dreamed before I woke up an hour later (now). Wide wide awake. What better time to get a few things done, like write a blog post (and eat some ice cream)...

First, a quick report from Saturday:

Can you spot the moose? This is at the cabin.

A nice neighbor by my in-laws' cabin volunteered to keep an eye on the rising river, so Jeff felt safe leaving the cabin for the day - which meant we took a spur of the moment trip to Yellowstone today. I love living close enough to Yellowstone (and Grand Teton Nat'l Park) that we can do day trips.

The new Visitor Education Center at Old Faithful is now open, so we took the kids there,

followed by a boardwalk tour of geysers, hot pots, steam vents, and a spectacular show put on by Old Faithful herself (himself?). We ended the evening with dinner in West Yellowstone and a play at the Playmill Theater (High School Musical - we loved it).

And home by 10pm. Asleep by 11. Awake by 12. Bother.

Family:

And snippets from my children's lives:

When we arrived in Yellowstone today, Charlotte asked a question I'd never considered, "Where is Purplestone?" Hmm.

When I told Eleanor it was going to be cold and snowy in Yellowstone, she informed me that she was warm-blooded. Yes, and warm-blooded little girls need to wear coats to keep warm.

Oliver has been speed-reading through the Harry Potter series for the, what, seventh time? Funny kid - when I told him he'd have to either clean his room or owe me housekeeping money, he found some coins and asked me how much. He just doesn't really care about having, keeping, saving, spending, or losing the stuff. Or keeping his room clean.

Samuel, on the other hand, has been working every chance he could and saving every cent he earned to finally get enough money to buy a new DSI (handheld gaming device, for those who don't know). He's also a funny kid - he already has a DS. I guess it was his money, but I wouldn't have bought something that essentially replaces what I already have. Still, he has a great work ethic so he can do what he will (within reason) with his money.

Running and Reading:

I'm reading a running book or two, so that's why this is combined. I had a breakthrough run on Wednesday and found myself running long (2 miles each) intervals at a speed I didn't think I'd ever find again. My running partner pushed me through my barrier, but I tell you what - I've been recovering ever since!

The books are "Brain Training for Runners" (it's all in your head - just kidding, there's a lot lot lot more to it than that), and "Run Less, Run Faster" (doesn't that sound like having your cake and eating it, too? You can!).

Speaking of cake and reading, I went to a book group gathering this week (discussed "The Help" which I LOVED) and had the very best cake I've ever ever ever had. I begged for the recipe and will give it a go when it comes (and post it if I don't mess it up).

Ruminations:

Wouldn't it be nice if I actually had something to say? I honestly wonder if my creative juices flow only every other year or so. I want to say something, but I'm just too tired and too busy. So there goes any semblance of talent, now long hidden away under piles of laundry, peanut butter sandwiches, and thriving weeds - and withering away as quickly as if I'd sprayed round-up on my once-emerging flower of writing.

So busy, yet I have time to run. Hmm - priorities? I run at 5:30am so I can be home by 7 to be the mom. Would I write at 5:30am? Goodness, no - I'd fall asleep! It's hard to fall asleep when you're running, so perhaps that's why running happens and writing doesn't.

Of course, there's always the chance that a midnight blog post will revive the dead or dying writer in me. (Is this what they call burning the candle at both ends?)

I'll post some pictures of our trip later. Not like later tonight, but later tomorrow. Oh, wait, it is tomorrow. 12:40am. Bed. Again. And sleep again. For more than one hour, I hope.

And now for May 30th, Monday:

We decided to stay closer to home so we made a morning trip to the Zoo after Jeff got back from a 40 mile ride. (The group he rode with kept going - Jeff turned off early - and they finished their ride at the same time we got back from the zoo. By then it was raining and snowing. Maybe they should've gone to the zoo, too.)

We had to go to the zoo. Really. Eleanor has been begging for a year to go back and we needed to satisfy her (so we could have a little peace :) Just kidding). When we told her we'd go, she practically jumped through the ceiling with joy. She and sweet little Charlotte (who follows big sister everywhere) packed up their backpacks with nature books, put on "nature shoes" and Eleanor donned a pink Cowgirl hat (I guess she thinks that's Naturalist garb). She has wanted to be a Naturalist before she even knew the word. A trip to the zoo helped her along that path (although she was somewhat disappointed to end the day still not being an official Naturalist).

My bunch. Cute, eh?

The boys had just as much fun as the girls. I wish I'd taken a picture of a certain monkey (no, not my child) that buddied up to my boys. We'll just have to go back and visit their new pal sometime.

Best seat in the house - Dad's shoulder.

Eleanor, Charlotte, Samuel, and Oliver. And a fake tiger.

My parents' house is in full bloom. I couldn't resist posting the pictures of spring colors (it's about time we had spring, since Summer is theoretically just around the corner). My mom does a marvelous job with her flowers, which we all enjoy.

Recipes:

I made frozen yogurt pie last week. The crumb crust was made from cinnamon cookies I'd made that nobody liked - so I crumbed the cookies, added some graham cracker crumbs, and some butter to make it stick. So easy. Then I mixed about 2 cups of plain yogurt with a small carton of Cool Whip (gently so it stays nice and fluffy). I had crushed up strawberries and added sugar (Eleanor calls it "Strawberry Mush"), so I stirred in the strawberry mush to the yogurt mixture, spooned it all into the crust, popped it into the freezer, and voila - a delicious dessert.

Oliver (my gourmet guy) has been begging me to try a recipe for blueberry muffins. The recipe is printed on a hand towel that has been hanging on the cabinet handle for some time now. The batter turned out quite thick, almost like cookie dough, and I was worried it'd be a waste. But they baked up nicely and turned out more like scones than typical muffins. Jeff raved about them, and when Jeff likes something you know it's good. The only drawback was they didn't taste as good the second day, so eat 'em fresh! The recipe says baking "powder" then the directions say baking "soda" - I stuck with the baking powder (more biscuity and it was tasty!).

Blueberry Muffins from the Hand Towel (I doubled it for my family, but here's the single batch recipe)

2 Cups Flour

1/2 Cup Sugar

1/2 tsp. Salt

1 Tbs. Baking Powder

1 1/2 Cups Blueberries

1/4 Cup Milk

1/2 Cup Butter, Melted

2 Eggs, Beaten

In a large bowl, combine flour, sugar, salt and baking powder (the is where the hand towel says "soda" - never trust a hand towel)

Add 1 Tablespoon of flour mixture to blueberries, tossing to coat.

In a small bowl, combine milk, butter and eggs until blended. Stir into flour mixture just until moistened. Fill in blueberries. Spoon evenly into greased or paper lined muffin cups. Bake 10-25 minutes at 400. Makes 8-10 muffins.

Lasagna Soup

(Warning: this uses fake food, but it's good when you're in a rush). I actually made this in a Dutch Oven on the stove, then later put it in a crock pot just before dinner to reheat.

1 lb. ground beef
1/2 C. chopped onion
1 pckg (7 3/4 oz) lasagna dinner mix (This is where I'm embarrassed - using a box. I had bought some when on sale for food storage and needed to use them up, so today's soup was a triple batch)
5 cups water
1 can (14 1/2 oz) diced tomatoes, undrained (I used tomatoes from my in-laws' garden that I'd canned - don't know if I'll ever can again, but it was good to have in storage)
1 can (7oz) whole kernel corn, undrained (I used corn from my in-laws' garden that I had frozen last year)
2 Tbs. grated Parmesan cheese
Any veggies you want to add. I sauteed green peppers and celery, threw in some canned mushrooms (no, I didn't can them from my in-laws' garden :) hee-hee), And at the end you can put in zucchini, summer squash, etc.

In a Dutch oven (which I used) or soup kettle, cook beef and onion over medium heat until no longer pink, drain. Add contents of lasagna dinner SAUCE MIX (not the noodles yet), water, tomaotes, corn, other vegetables (but not soft veggies, like the zucchini or summer squash), and Parmesan cheese (I forgot to put in the Parmesan this time, it was fine).; bring to a boil. Reduce heat; cover and simmer for 10 minutes, stirring occasionally. Add the lasagna noodles and zucchini or other squash. Cover and simmer for 10 minutes or until noodles are tender.
Makes 2 1/2 qts (10 servings).

Speaking of Dutch Ovens, I made our chicken in one this week because the grill was out of gas and I like Dutch Ovens. In the background is some asparagus from my in-laws' garden. Tasty!

Besides asparagus, chicken, fruit, & cottage cheese, here is also baked sweet potato fries (my favorite!). Cut sweet potatoes into strips, brush with olive oil, sprinkle with coarse salt, and bake at 400F on a baking sheet for about 40 minutes, stirring occasionally.

And the trick to asparagus, by the way, is this:

Cut off the woody ends, rinse, then soak in a pan of ice water. Meanwhile, bring a large skillet of water to a boil on the stove. When boiling, add chilled asparagus to the water, then let the water return to a boil. As soon as it begins to boil, remove the asparagus and return it to the ice water pan (you might need to add more ice). The asparagus is perfectly cooked. Sometimes I then grill it a little (brushed with olive oil and sprinkled with salt). Sooooo good.

The wrap was so pretty I had to take a picture. I used Italian Flat-Out bread, alfalfa sprouts, lots of lettuce, carrots, and left-over chicken, and mustard for flavor.

I made these bran muffins a while ago. I'll add the recipe later (the kids are going crazy with me on the computer). The nice thing is that you make the recipe, bake up what you want, and keep the rest of the batter in the fridge - then bake new muffins as needed. Scrumptious.

Water water everywhere

Summer vacation began with a windchill of 33F today, winds up to 50mph (gusts), clouds, and chance of rain. Gotta love Rexburg.

This is a view of the watered valley from the top of the Menan Butte (the "R" Mountain) on an early morning run last week. There's even more water now.

Jeff's been at his parents' cabin most of his free time this week (and the week before, and the week before that). The river runneth over, and so he has to tend the pumps. He's keeping the water at bay, but just barely. I guess we should be grateful for cool temperatures so that the snow pack doesn't melt too quickly! I suggested taking the family to the cabin so we could spend time together, but Jeff is worried about safety with the water so high and so fast. So what to do for Memorial Day that will keep us sort of close to home in case the water rises? I don't know. Go bowling, I guess.

It's 1am so I'm going back to bed, but I did want to remember a cute Charlotte story. She opened a fortune cookie this week and had me read it to her: "There is a pleasant surprise in store for you." She was thrilled and wanted to go immediately to the store to get her pleasant surprise! She was not happy when I tried explaining to her that there wasn't really a surprise at a store... Personally, I think 3 year olds are too young to have their fortunes told.

Note to Self

What do you get when you run dehydrated and don't replenish electrolytes during or after (and then drink too much water the next two days because you're thirsty)? Edema. Water retention. Hyponatremia. My 20 mile run Saturday was a little sluggish, but manageable. The 12 lbs water gained over the last two days since the run, however, is just ridiculous. Lesson learned: drink before you're thirsty, pop the electrolyte pills even on a cool morning, and avoid free water ("free" not as in cost, but as in just plain water). I knew that. I really did. After years of long runs, I pretty much have my body figured out. I just kind of forgot, I guess. Oh, well. Better on a training run than in a race! I do not like the puffy marshmallow feeling and can't wait for my body to settle back down. Meanwhile, I'm taking two complete rest days and drinking Nuun, Gatorade, chicken broth, and tea. No water pills - the last thing I need is to be dehydrated again.

I hope I remember what I already know next time I do a long run. Silly me.

How to Bounce an Egg (really!)

Oliver and I have been working on his science project. I haven't had so much fun in a long time! Did you know you can soak a raw egg in vinegar for 3-4 days, take the egg out, and bounce it? Yup. The vinegar dissolves the shell and sort of "cooks" the white, and voila - a bouncing egg.

But be sure to bounce the egg outside - it's still raw and after a few bounces it bursts. A bouncing egg is cool. A splattered egg isn't.

Family Time

We got to attend my big brother's graduation last week. He got his Ph.D. in something or other (just kidding - I know what it was, just not how to explain it. It has to do with instructional technology).

It was fun to have all the Croasmun side little ones together. The kids sure had fun! (So did we).

Caramel Frosted Yellow Cake

And I haven't posted any food pics for a while. I have to put this on because it was so tasty. A yellow cake w/pudding in the mix, then a butter caramel frosting. I baked two 9x9 square pans and cut each in half, so there are four layers with frosting in between. Then I topped it with truffles and pressed nuts on the side - scrumptious.

Homemade Greek Yogurt

I've also been making my own Greek Yogurt lately. It's fun, it's way cheaper than store-bought, and fresh yogurt tastes so good. Basically you just make yogurt (plenty of recipes online), then strain off the whey (I use coffee filters). Use a store-bought Greek Yogurt for the start.

Heat up 4 qts good quality milk (any %fat will do) to 180F, then let cool to 120F, then stir in about 2 tsp. Plain Greek Yogurt. Place in slightly warm oven (heat it up for a minute or so, then turn it off). Keep the bowl covered with saran wrap and wrapped in a towel. The trick then is to keep the oven between 105-120F (NO HOTTER or it will kill the yogurt bacteria). I just keep my oven light on with a thermometer in the oven, and when it starts getting hot, I turn off the light. Yes, I do have to be around, but it's not hard if I'm home anyway. It takes 10-12 hours. Then pour off the water (whey), and strain in batches in coffee filters. If you over-strain it, it gets almost a cottage cheese consistency, which is fine if you like it that way. I mix in fresh berries (frozen work, too), honey, homemade jam, whatever. It's high protein and just plain good eats.