How Fragile We Are

Yesterday left me thinking about how fragile life is. How fragile, and how very little control we have. And how precious every moment is that we live and breathe and carry on.

Two experiences, back to back, put me into this mood. First, we as a family attended the kick-off meeting for this year's Relay for Life. One of Jeff's patients had invited us to the meeting because the patient would be speaking. Of the three speakers, one was the mother of a patient and two were patients, so I don't know which one invited us. They all touched my heart.

As they spoke of their battles with cancer, of the support from friends and family, and even a little of Dr. Hancock's help in saving their lives, I couldn't stop the tears. My heart aches for their struggles, yet I know we'd all rather be loved than pitied. I listened to the speakers in awe, overcome by their incredible endurance. I am so inspired by them for being so strong, and proud of my husband for doing this difficult line of work.

There are many times when Jeff has to stay late or go in early or go in on a day off or spend so much of the limited "our time" on the phone. Having survived the long years of medical school, the brutal hours of residency, and the rigors of Fellowship, I cling to the free time that we actually get together. I remember Samuel asking once, "Can Daddy come over today?" It has been a long row to hoe. And often a lonely one. Still.

But at the Relay for Life, I was reminded how it is all worth it. The best thing we can do is to help each other through this life. I gave up my career to stay home and help the kids through their life. It's not all that glamorous, but it is all that important. I give up much of the time with my husband so he can help others, too. Sometimes his help is to simply assist others to live another day. And that is truly important. Every new day is a precious gift. A few years ago I told Jeff that I had realized something: that even though I'm not out saving the world like he is, I am supporting him so that he can. That's my contribution. I sometimes miss the satisfaction I had when I was working, and I often miss the chance to socialize, but in the grand scheme of things, they don't really matter.

Dr. Hancock, one speaker said, saved my son's life. I bawled. Dr. Hancock, the second speaker said, told me I was all clear. I bawled again. Dr. Hancock's wife, the last one said, befriended me at the park shortly before I found out I had cancer and went to meet Dr. Hancock for the first time. I blinked in amazement that she remembered. I'm sure to her that was such a little thing for a stranger to chat with her, but hearing her last night talk about how I'd been kind, well, it meant the world to me. It was as if she recognized that I'm doing what I can, that even though I'm in the shadows, I matter. I'd had a really hard day yesterday, and she just pulled me straight out of the murky, choking waters of self-pity. She is the one fighting cancer, not me. She is the one who deserved praise, not me. But how blessed those words were. Thank you. I don't even know her name, but thank you.

The people around us at the meeting hadn't asked for cancer. Hadn't asked for leukemia. Hadn't asked that they or their children or their parents or brothers or sisters become fighters in this battle. But there they were, standing up together with the courage and hope of a trained army. I am so humbled by their strength.

So disease can throw off our life plans. That was the first of two how-fragile-we-are reality-checks last night.

The second was on our way home after the Relay for Life meeting. We'd stopped to tour the new (and AMAZING) Conference Center at BYU-Idaho, then hopped in the car to go home. It was already past the kids' bedtime. We were a block away from home when suddenly we had to stop the car. In front of us, on the street, were two bodies covered in blankets and people running frantically around. Apparently, just moments before we got there two college students had been crossing the street and were both hit by an oncoming car. The driver pulled over, another car stopped behind her, traffic stopped in both lanes, and people were scrambling to find even more blankets to cover the two students. It was a cold, February night. The students had landed with one on each lane. As Jeff pulled over and my brain pieced together the scene, I knew Jeff had to help. The kids and I sat in the car with the hazard lights flashing, watching as Jeff attended each of the victims. Each student had a cluster of people around them. Jeff knelt to assess each one, and was shortly joined by another physician who was driving the same road. They stayed on the scene until the ambulance and police arrived. As far as we know, the students will be okay but were pretty well banged up.

The students had been crossing the street on the pedestrian cross-walk. The yellow lights for their crossing were flashing, so presumably they'd pushed the light before crossing. Legally, they had done nothing wrong. I imagine they assumed the driver had seen them and would stop. Unfortunately, she didn't see them. I'm positive she didn't mean to hit them, but sometimes it's hard to see at night or a driver isn't paying attention. Luckily, nobody died.

You know, even when you have the right of way and are obeying the laws, it doesn't make a difference if an oncoming car doesn't stop. Maybe the students had even paused to see if the car saw them... I don't know. (We talked with our kids later about how so often students here cross the road rightfully, but they don't make sure cars see them. And it is scary. It happens alllll the time.)

Reality check: life is fragile. And ultimately we don't have much say in how long our time here will be. And even if we've taken all the precautions, pushed the cross-walk button, looked both ways, taken care of our bodies...well, any of us could get hit by something - whether it be a life-threatening disease or an oncoming car - at anytime. And it might not be anybody's fault. It just happens. We can't control these things that affect our lives. The only thing we can control is how we react.

I think when we respect our mortality and respect each other, when we do our best to help each other and walk hand-in-hand, when we watch out for each other, then it doesn't really matter how long or short our life is. What matters is what we've done with it. What matters is who we've helped in our own little sphere - whether it be the children around you or the patients who come to your husband's office, or the students who cross the street - we're all a part of this beautiful, fragile, wonderful world.

______________________________

Ideas to keep kids occupied on a day off from school (when it was -24F with a -36F windchill!):

Play-Doh Penguins

Then put the penguin on your sister's head.

If all else fails, dress up the lampshade. Just don't let anything burn.

Charlotte's hair is so long it reaches her waist. Jeff put her hair up in my swim cap, which was a smart idea and I wonder why I never thought of it. Sam's off to the right, under water. Eleanor is sporting her pink goggles. Oliver was at basketball practice, or else he'd have been in the picture, too. Just pretend he's there.

Recipes: Good ol' fashioned New England Whoopie Pies.

Heads up: this is NOT a low calorie food.

Yield: 16 Whoopie Pies

3 Cups sugar

1 Cup butter or margarine, softened

4 eggs

1/2 Cup Vegetable oil

1 Tablespoon vanilla

6 Cups All Purpose Flour

2 Cups unsweetened cocoa powder

1 teaspoon baking powder

1 1/2 Tablespoons baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

3 Cups milk

Preheat oven to 350F, or convection to 315F.

In a large bowl of an electric mixer, beat the sugar, butter and eggs together until well combined. Add oil and vanilla and beat again.

In a separate bowl, combine all the dry ingredients. Add half of the dry mixture to the egg mixture and beat or stir to blend. Add 1 1 /2 cups milk and beat again. Add remaining dry mixture and beat until incorporated. Add remaining 1 1/2 cups milk and beat until blended.

With a large spoon, scoop out 32 circles of batter onto a greased baking sheet. (6 circles on a large jelly-roll sheet, each circle about 3" diameter). Bake for 10-12 minutes - there will be cracks in the top of the pies. Let cool.

Make Whoopie Pies into sandwich-style with filling between two flat sides of pies. Try to match circle sizes as best as possible.

Filling:

I'm including two different ones - 1st is the one my mom always made when I was growing up, and 2nd is the one we like to make now. (The recipe above is very similar but not quite the same she made, but I found it works better for the elevation I'm at right now).

#1: Mom's (I've doubled it because I always run out otherwise):

1 1/2 C. Flour

2 C. Shortening

1 tsp. Salt

Beat above until creamy. Gently add 1 1/2 C. COLD water and beat thoroughly. Add 6 C. sifted powder sugar, beat well.

#2: The one we use now:

3 Cups Shortening (I know, ugh. Oh, well)

6 Cups powdered sugar

~3 Cups marshmallow fluff (topping)

Dash salt

2 tsp. vanilla

2/3 - 1 Cup milk (as needed)

In a deep bowl (so stuff doesn't fly out everywhere), combine all ingredients except milk and beat well. Add just enough milk to achieve a creamy consistency. Spread filling inside Whoopie Pies.

Oliver got his first pair of glasses and I have a new pair. It's nice to see. I gave up on my contacts (except for races or training).

I need to get a picture with Jeff - our glasses are almost identical. I liked how his looked so much I got some for myself. Funny, when we first met we had the same frames and have pretty much copied each other ever since.

Sleepless and going strong. Maybe too strong.

Sometimes do you just shake your head at yourself and wonder what in the world is going on in your head? I do. My head, I mean - not yours. I surprise myself by doing uncharacteristic things and I wonder how well do I really know me, anyway?

For example, if you (me) were tossing and turning and just not sleeping, you might get up, have a glass of milk, read a book under a dim light and warm blanket, and try to get back to dreamland. But last night I guess I wasn't really me (or maybe this is the real me?) and at 1:30 a.m., I decided I'd had enough of staying in bed, wide-eyed and antsy. So I walked downstairs to the basement, changed into my swimming suit, donned my swim cap, adjusted my goggles and earplugs, set my swiMP3 to scriptures, opened the pool, and swam for the next 36 minutes.

Okay, well, a nice easy swim would be relaxing, wouldn't it? Yes, it would. But that's not what I did. I cranked the speed and kicked out 2000 yards (approximate), the equivalent of the Half-Ironman 1.2 mile swim distance. I have been swimming at 1:50 (that's one minute, 50 seconds) for every 100 yards, but that didn't jive with my middle-of-the-night workout, so I set it to an unprecedented (for me, anyway) 1:36/100yds. Arms flailing, legs kicking, heart racing, and gasping for air. Oh, yeah. That's how this lady attacks a sleepless night.

Listening to my scriptures didn't slow me down at all, as one might expect. They actually kept me focused and alert - mostly because I somehow changed the setting to shuffle. Ever try listening to books on you ipod with the chapters on shuffle? It jumps around, leaving you guessing at where you are, what's going to happen next, and wondering how to get the darn thing off shuffle.

So with the swim done, and my daily scripture study checked off (it counts!), and a warm shower followed by hair-drying, I faced my bed again. It was now 2:30 a.m. You'd think I'd be ready to relax. Well, my mind kept saying "relax - rest - SLEEP" but my body wouldn't settle. Nope. Not a bit. I spent the next few hours wandering around my mind, thinking of things to do, things that have happened, things that might happen. It's a lot of ground to cover in a few hours, but I think I pretty much thought through my whole life, start to finish. Twice.

FINALLY it was 5 a.m. - a decent hour to let my body rise from the bed-prison. Really, it felt like a torture sentence to just hang out on my bed, knowing I really really needed to sleep, but not being able to do a thing about it. I didn't dare take any sleep aids, because (knowing me) they'd kick in right about the time I had to get up to get kids to school, and I'd be groggy the rest of the day. Not worth it. I welcomed the morning (I know, it's still the middle of the night for most people, but close enough to morning that I felt justified in getting up).

I had a running appointment with my friend at 5:45. I do not need 45 minutes to get ready to run (especially since I'd set out my clothes the night before), but I did need to get moving. So up and at 'em, and I pulled on my layers for an outside run. The weather had been predicted to drop only to 19F, but I'm always cold so I dressed as if it was going to be 0F. That's ZERO degrees. Well, whaddayaknow? It wasn't 19F. It was zero. But I was dressed for it, so I decided to see how it went.

Thankfully, my running partner has a smart head on her shoulders (I wonder if she would've tackled the pool at 1:30 a.m.?), and texted me that it was too cold. Oh, right. I get painful blisters on my feet if I get too cold. How could I forget? So plans changed, I changed, and at 5:45 I was headed to the new indoor track at BYU-Idaho. Shorts and t-shirt instead of long underwear, tights, windpants, three head coverings, two jackets, and two sets of gloves. I felt lighter somehow.

We ran on the track for the first time. And I mean RAN. Like my pool workout a few hours before, it wasn't any of this nice, slow, relaxing exercise. Nosirree. If I'm staying awake all night because I have too much energy, then by golly I'm running that energy into the ground! After about 6 1/2 miles of hard running, I figured I was ready to go home. I felt like maybe, just maybe, I'd worn down a little.

Yeah, right. I felt as fresh as ever. So I made the boys' school lunches, cooked everybody French toast, sliced oranges, got the kids up, the girls dressed, everyone ready, drove three kids to school/preschool, shooed the other one off to the bus stop, and ran upstairs to put on my winter layers. Again. It had warmed up to 8F by then (nearly 9 a.m.), but because the sun was shining it seemed almost like a summer day. I grabbed my skate skis, new poles, boots, and keys and drove off to the groomed trail at the golf course outside of town.

Wow, what a beautiful morning. The trees were frosted and glowing in the morning sun, the trail was perfectly groomed with no other tracks on it (except once in a while I'd see the pattern of a skier who'd gone before me and had stepped out of the parallel trail to mark some Vs in the skating trail). There were two other people out, but they were so far away I felt like it was just me. It was all mine.

Armed with warm gear, too much energy (STILL!), and the surge of life from seeing sunshine, I shot out onto the trail to do my fastest 3.5 miles yet on that course. It was invigorating, refreshing, and actually, finally, thankfully exhausting! By the end, I was ready to sit and rest.

I sat and rested for the entire time it took me to drive home. That's it. Fifteen minutes of down time, then it was back to normal life - shower (my second of the day), pick up Charlotte, drive the kindergarten carpool, cook dinner, make phone calls (our fridge is on the blink, the insurance company is being a stinker, we lost the key to our file cabinet, Sam needs an orthodontist appointment, etc). I also vacuumed the carpets, played with the girls, got the boys to do their piano, did laundry, and went mini-golfing with my husband and kids for our Family night activity. We did our family scripture reading, then I read to the girls while Jeff read to the boys.

And now I'm blogging because I had to remember this crazy day - and night - when I was once again, the Energizer Bunny. It happens when I've been taking my training supplements (Hammer Nutrition Race Caps Supreme) regularly for a week or so. I really need to find the perfect dose so I can train normally and rest normally. Still, it's fun to have the energy. (For the record, they (Hammer) say it's the most potent legal energy enhancer on the market.) I didn't take any today. My mind is screaming at me that it just knows my body needs sleep, even if my body doesn't agree.

Now, at 9:30 p.m., I am beginning to feel sleepy. Or maybe it's just my contacts are making my dry eyes feel tired. Sheesh, I don't even know if I'm tired or not!

Time for a cookie. Cookies are the answer to the mysteries of my life. Maybe after one or two cookies, I can sort out what the deal was today with this person I call me.

Service with a Smile

Friends:

My friend Carole (she's pictured on the left side of the newspaper article in my previous post) asked me to teach her to skate ski. So yesterday, since Jeff was home and could watch the girls (Ellie was home sick from school), Carole & I took off to the groomed golf course and had a nice time learning technique, practicing balance and strokes, and working on gliding. I kept surprising myself at how similar skate skiing is to swimming in terms of finding your balance and doing drills and gliding. Carole did great and I had a fabulous time just being with a friend. That simply doesn't happen very often.

But this week it happened twice! I got to do another outside run with a different friend this week. I didn't even notice the time passing as we chatted under the bright full moon and navigated the dark, icy road. It was doubly rejuvenating - exercise plus friendship. Nice. Makes me happy.

Service with a Smile:

Thursday I taught a 3-year-old boy a swimming lesson in our Endless Pool. At a Relief Society "Service Auction" the night before I had offered a 1/2 hour swim lesson, and the boy's mother "bought" it (no money was involved - the ladies just got m&m's for currency based on how they answered a questionnaire on things like "Did you read your scriptures today - 5 points. Did you pet your cat/dog/goldfish - 2 points, etc.)

He was terrified at first, didn't want a thing to do with the water, and definitely wouldn't get his face near it. When I finally coaxed him into it, he wouldn't let go of me. I brought Charlotte in (she's also 3, but is not one bit scared of water - which scares me) so she could model how to be comfy in the water. It helped. I played games and stuff to trick him into getting over his fears. By the end of the session, he was letting me pull him on his back and on his tummy down the length of the pool and back, he was blowing bubbles in the water, he would lay the side of his face in the water and switch sides, and he went completely under (really fast and only once, but he did it!). It turned out to be a very rewarding experience for me. I couldn't ever offer swimming lessons on a regular basis, but once was sure fun!

Thursday also I babysat the children of a friend while she swam in our pool. Eleanor was home sick (she didn't go to school at all this week), so she was quarantined in my room. Charlotte got to take the lead with the 3 year old twins and 5 year old brother. I think the kids had fun (I did!), but by the end everyone was ready for a snack, a break, and their mom.

So it's been a good few days of teaching and serving. I love the gratification that comes from giving. I need to do it more.

The Family:

Samuel is on his first winter campout. I didn't sleep well last night because I was worried about him. They really ought to allow moms to go with the scouts... I'm sure Sam would be delighted. Not. I can't wait for him to come home SAFELY! Sam was excited, but maybe because he didn't know what he was getting into... Naw, winter camping is fun. I took a winter camping & survival course in college, and I remember enjoying it - when it was over. :)

Oliver is the handsome owner of a new pair of glasses. He looks great. This week we got to go as a family to a presentation his Discovery class put on. (Discovery is an accelerated learning program - not only did he skip a year of school but he's also at the top of his class - he's amazing!) They had a Star Lab in the gym. We crawled into a huge, blown-up dome with a star canister projecting stars on the dome. It was a planetarium and Oliver knew all the constellations. We also got to crawl into a smaller one that the kids had poked holes in to make their own constellations. Oliver's was called Hertum the Boar and he'd made an entire mythological history to go along with it. As we were the last ones leaving, the teachers asked us if we wanted the second smaller planetarium to take home. I am a pack rat, so yes, we brought it home. Sometime we'll set it up (I need to get a different fan) and make good memories, lying on our backs and looking at the unique hand-made constellations.

Eleanor had a lazy week on the couch because she was sick sick sick. Her fever would not go down! Every morning I'd wake her up to get ready for school, then see she was burning up. I'd check her temperature and read 103.5F or whatever, and send her back to bed. Poor girl. Of course, now that it's Saturday, she not only woke up too early (and got me up, too) but her fever is gone. There's no point being sick on the weekend, is there?

Charlotte is writing more and more and wants to read. I need to take advantage of her interest and teach her before she loses the desire. I need to do so many things. I wish I were five people - one of me for each child and one for everything else. Then I might get all the things done that I want. Anyway, she's a beautiful creature who thinks she's a fish. She LOVES to swim.

Running

I ran outside once this week on a nice 15F morning, then the next morning I was so excited about my outside running I decided to do it again - until I saw the temperature. It was -1F, with a windchill of -13F. So instead of walking out the door, I walked down the stairs and got on the treadmill. My poor treadmill is wearing out. The belt slips and we've replaced and tightened it, but it's just a cheap treadmill with a million miles on it. I ran out my last treadmill - it literally went up in smoke. Time to start looking for a new one, I think. I also rode my bike trainer, which was disappointingly boring. I know that - like the treadmill - you just have to keep doing it until you get used to it and then begin to enjoy it. Everything I've read says it takes a good 2 weeks to get used to the bike trainer. Bah, humbug. Swimming is sooooo nice. I'm ready to speed up my swims now, which I find exciting. I love to see improvement.

Reading:

I finished Maniac Magee (loved it) and started "The Help". I actually started it last night while Jeff and Oliver were at a Barbershop Quartet concert, Sam was at the campout, and I'd put the girls to bed. Ahhh, "me" time. Sigh. It was pleasant. And I was surprised at how I immediately got into the book. Often it takes me a good 100 pages or so. Not this one. It's the story of life written from the perspective of an African American (she calls herself "black") lady who was hired help in the 1960's. She tells her and her friends' (who are also "the help" in other white households) stories. Interesting, and heartbreaking. I can't imagine people being treated as less than equals. Color, station, wealth, education, successes - these things do not matter. These things do not make one person more valuable than another. Ugh. I'd better stop now before I get all worked up. I'm mad at the past - and, I guess, at the present. Anytime there's an inequality that devalues people, I just want to yell STOP IT. And BE NICE. Is it really so hard?

Off to tackle the day. I'm eyeing the clock, wondering when Samuel will walk in the door and hoping he was warm last night.

This week's re-cap

Reading: This week I read "Esperanza Rising" and started "Maniac Magee" (I'm nearly done with it), which means I didn't get much housework done this week. But I am enjoying my time a lot more! There's a very nice lady in the neighborhood who comes for a couple of hours every Monday to help me keep the house clean - I'm nervous about what she'll think tomorrow when she comes and sees my neglected home. Oh, well. Swallow my pride and get back to my books...

"Esperanza" was particularly interesting because it was set in the area where I served my Spanish-speaking LDS mission. I could picture the landscape and hear the people speaking, and I felt a kinship to the characters. Whenever I read about people overcoming or enduring great trials, I always feel inspired and humbled.

"Maniac" is hard to put down. Its a story of a talented orphan who wants an address, who runs, runs, runs, and who touches the lives of unexpected and unsuspecting people. He doesn't see social barriers that surround him, which softens some people and hardens others. I hope it ends well.

Recipes: Nothing spectacular on the Recipes. I made crockpot chili, some different breads, baked enchiladas, beef and broccoli stir-fry, and various fruit smoothies this week. Nuttin' unusual to report.

Running: This includes riding my bike trainer, swimming, cross-country (skate) skiing, P90X, and all other forms of exercise. This week I got a lot of cross training in. I also got in the newspaper. I was skate skiing at the golf course when the reporter showed up, stopped me (and shortened my work-out time! Oh, well), and asked a gazillion questions. My neighbors were there, also, and he took their pictures for the article. Here's a copy, but it's too small to read well. I guess you'll just have to trust me that they quoted me throughout. (This way maybe I can trick you into thinking I said some really insightful, deep things...)

Ruminations: It's been a crazy week, what with the news of Sam's braces (and him getting his teeth pulled Friday), and Oliver's glasses (they should be done by tomorrow), my own cavity and my first try at laughing gas (wowsers -I wish I could go to the dentist every day now!), swimming lessons, piano lessons, scout activities, two basketball games, two basketball practices, a date (HOORAY!) with Jeff to "Forever Plaid" (wonderful! - Jeff's old friend from Scout Camp days was one of the four Plaids), a trip to IF (I'm getting new skate-ski POLES), teeth cleaning, eye checks, Sam's fever (he's been sick today and yesterday; his fever averaged around 103F), and just plain ol' life - whew! I'm tuckered out! I think it'd be nice to slow down for a few days before we get back to the grind. The kids have no school tomorrow or Tuesday, so we've got to figure out how to stay busy but also slow down.

I know - I'll read a book. :) I can clean the floors tomorrow (I love Sundays - day of rest, so I feel absolutely no guilt at not doing housework (except the bare minimum) and no compulsion to even try!)

Speaking of Sunday, today Eleanor and the boys all invented new games. We've spent the afternoon playing their various games (Ellie: a version of "Blue's Clues" called "Ellie's Adventure", Oliver - a card game of chance called "Bam", Sam - a Lego board game to retrieve a brick, called "Brick Adventure"). We also got out all 8 new cans of play-doh and made various creations. Charlotte is now sitting on my lap, so I think I'd better quit before she begins to blog. Have a nice week, everyone.

Braces, Glasses, Swimming lessons, Oh my!

Every once in a while, I have such an incredibly full day that, in retrospect, I can't imagine how it all came together. This was one of those days. Samuel even commented tonight that today sure was a busy day. Sure was.

Just for the record, here's a full day:

5:00 My alarm goes off. I spend the next thirty minutes trying to justify staying in bed, and finally I conquer my sleepy self (I was drugged on codeine for my cough so it was no easy task to pull myself out of bed).

5:30 I actually get up, telling myself I'm just going to swim, but I grab some running socks anyway (just in case) and head downstairs.

5:34 I'm in my triathlon shorts and tank because I can run in it AND swim in it - just in case I do both.

5:36 I tricked myself into running. I run for the next 45 minutes. (6.25 miles).

6:25 Well, that wasn't so bad. Now I tell myself I'll just swim 1/2 mile (15 minutes or so).

7:00 35 minutes and one mile later, I am done (one pool-mile is different than a land-mile, by the way).

7:20-8:30 I have showered and dressed and am making lunches for the boys.

This hour I spend getting four children up, dressed, breakfasted, ready for school, and out the door. Sam does his piano practice. Jeff takes Oliver and Eleanor to school for me. Thanks!

8:30-9 I get Charlotte ready for the day, clean up from breakfast.

9-9:30 I get dinner going (Crockpot chili and breadmachine potato bread - I know this is the only chance I'll have to cook today).

9:30-10:30 I hang out with Charlotte in the playroom while I fold laundry and she plays around on the computer and with her toys. I actually put the folded clothes away. (That, in itself, is worthy of a full day).

10:30-11 Charlotte and I just play - we're dragons that breathe fire and have tea parties.

11 - Eleanor comes home! I get the girls their lunch.

-So far, the morning has been pretty easy, pretty normal, pretty low-key. This is where we push the speed-up button and things go crazy:

11:45 The girls and I check Samuel out of school

12:00 Sam has an orthodontist appointment. He's going to need teeth pulled (tomorrow!) and braces put on (in the next two weeks or so). Braces, I learn, cost thousands of dollars. But Sam definitely needs them so it's worth it. He's excited. For now, anyway.

1:10 We leave the orthodontist and head to the dentist to make an appointment for tomorrow's teeth extraction.

1:30 We check Oliver out of school and run a few errands.

2:00 -3:30 Samuel, Oliver, Eleanor and I all have our eyes checked. The kids get their daily reading done in between each other's appointments. Charlotte is very patient with us all. Samuel has the option of getting glasses, but decides he can handle one eye being off a little. Doc puts me in contacts. I hate them, but maybe I'll get used to them. Oliver needs glasses. He's excited. For now, anyway.

3:45 Everyone is hungry. We have a little snack while we wait for our swimming teacher to show up.

4:00 Daryn shows up for our first (trial-run) swimming lessons in our miniature pool. The boys go first, and it turns out they're too advanced to do much more in our pool. They'll need a big pool where they can splash and dive and stuff. Meanwhile, they can work on endurance in our pool, but Daryn doesn't need to teach them.

4:30-5 Daryn teaches the girls. There is PLENTY for the girls to learn from her. She'll keep coming back once a week or so to teach the girls. I'm relieved - the girls need the help and I don't mind so much paying for private lessons for half the kids. (I was seriously wondering if I'd be able to afford all four kids - but the boys don't need her, so that's good).

5 - Sam's off to basketball practice. Oliver does his piano practice. I spend the next half-hour talking with Daryn and cleaning up the pool room.

5:30-6 Oliver asked nicely so I agreed to a game of Slamwich. He wins. Of course.

6-7 Dinner.

7-7:30 PJs, teeth and toilet ("PTT" we call it). Jeff comes home.

7:30 - 8 The boys are allowed to watch a basketball game and the girls watch "The Wonder Pets". I clean up after dinner. Jeff goes out to snow blow all the new snow (it's a lot!)

8-8:30 I read to the girls, the boys finish up their basketball game and get some more reading done.

8:30-8:45 Family scriptures and prayer. Jeff comes in.

8:45 - 9:15 Sam is allowed to stay up and read a little more (Oliver decided he was just too tired), the girls are asleep, Jeff's on the phone, and I'm blogging. And pleased that so much has been done today.

If Jeff's not busy, I'm looking forward now to either watching an episode of Psych, or one from the BBC production "Lark Rise to Candleford". If he has work to do, then I'll read myself to sleep. I'm reading "Esperanza Rising" and have found myself drawn into the story fully. The main portion of the story is set in the heart of where I served my Spanish-speaking mission, and the main characters are Mexican, so I feel like I'm a part of this book in a small way.

Tomorrow, by the way, won't be any less chaotic. Sam has his teeth pulled at 11 and I drive the kindergarten carpool at 11 (Jeff will be around to help out), then I have an appointment to have my scars looked at in Idaho Falls at 3, then Oliver has basketball practice at 6, and we have a babysitter coming at 7 so Jeff and I can go to a play at 7:30. And in between all that, there's homework, piano practice, reading, cooking, cleaning, and just plain living to be done. I can't wait for Saturday. Oh, wait. Saturday. Two basketball games, Saturday chores, and preparing for a Relief Society activity...!!!!

One thing at a time. Just breathe....

No school Monday or Tuesday! I propose complete rest days. Please. :)

Sure is quiet around here

I lost my voice. For nearly three days I've only been able to whisper. Although the kids seem to like it just fine, it's very inconvenient for me. I have to admit, however, that it's been pretty peaceful. Hmm. Not sure I like what that implies! Here's to my kids' shiny happy voices - may they always speak beautiful words (because if they argue, Mom has no voice to tell them to stop!).